Posts tagged techno-hatred
I blog to you now from the comfort of my bed which is located in the BFG Apartment! Finally!! The last couple of days have been a real bitch. Moving just sucks. And then comes the unpacking and the final trips to the old place to gather everything (the stuff I left behind has totally been at it like rabbits… I swear I left two pairs of shoes and a mirror… after 2 extra runs with the Pearl, I STILL have stuff there! As Miki pointed out… it’s like they are wet Gremlins!), and the relating to new neighbors. Mine walk their cat. I swear to GOD!! Her name is Princess Coconut. (The cat, not the neighbor. No clue what her name is) And although the neighbors have time to drag their cat down the street by a halter, they don’t seem concerned with the overflowing rubbish bins! Now do I already play the dickwad neighbor who moves in and starts telling people what to do?? I don’t want to be that new guy! I hate that new guy! But I hate what piles of trash bring with it. And I don’t think Princess Coconut is the feline for the job!
(I will make every opportunity to capture the dragging of the cat on film!)
And now, in addition, I have (well, had) the opportunity to audition for the college circuit. That’s right, I could go to SUNY Geneseo and be funny. It was an honor to be nominated and it would have been cool but you audition ON LINE!! That’s right. 3mins of your best mp3 or pdf or whatever you kids call it. Yeah, turns out, I am just not capable of the technical aspect of this gig. I am typing right now on a laptop powered by dial up because although Verizon could transfer my phone licktey split, the DSL… that takes time. And short of asking the kids of Nannyland to take on this project (to be honest, I think even they would have a hard time converting VHS to mp3), I was fresh out of luck! Did I mention it has to be in by midnight tonight???
So, I get this brilliant idea, to play a video of me being funny on my TV which is small and run with rabbit ears! (still no cable here but it is coming, I swear!) and film the TV (with me on it) with my camera!! I know how to upload videos from my SONY Cybershot!! Then I would make some funny joke about technology being beyond me and hope that the actual funny is enough! Guess what?? I get it all set up, choose the 3 minutes of VHS goodness that I want to film which happened after I found and unpacked that tape, and went to film… My camera battery is DEAD!! Seriously people!! Un-friggin’-believable! At this point, there is no way to make it happen and so… goodbye, college circuit career! Hello Learning Annex Computers for Retards class!
Now, who wants to help me paint??